I’m currently working on a piece of non-fiction about talking on the phone. I’ve known both people who love it and people who would rather text out a painfully long story or question than verbally speak it over a telephone. Before I continue writing, I want to get some feedback: what is it that you like or don’t like about talking on the phone? Feel free to be blunt and honest (even if that means you comment anonymously).
First of all, I can’t make any motions when I’m on the phone. I used my hands a lot when I’m talking, but all that does on the phone is make it hard for the other person to hear me. Silences are far more awkward on the phone as well.
I would absolutely have to agree with Julie D. I am a big facial expression/physicality interpreter when I’m talking to someone. I think it’s vital to a conversation for me. If I can’t see what is going on physically or how someone is reacting, silences are made so much more uncomfortable.
Ditto to both of the above responses. I would almost always prefer in person communication, where body language, voice inflection and expression can assist in understanding. However, when it is not convenient to meet in person, and I need to speak to someone, telephoning would be the next best option. At least one can ‘hear’ voice intonation, which is virtually impossible with texting…short of a smiley/winky etc., face. Not to mention, just ‘hearing’ a loved ones voice, or a friend, can be very comforting, when time or distance does not allow for meeting in person. When there is a short message, question, or just not enough time to meet or phone, texting (emailing, messaging), is a great option. However, typing out a longer text/conversation for 5-10 minutes or more, when it can say it in a fraction of the time, is annoying and a time waster.
One last thought regarding texting. Could it be that there are times when the ‘in person’/'on the phone’ conversation is just so uncomfortable that people can more easily communicate by the written word? Or perhaps…even hide behind it? Probably.
In apartment complexes, when you live on the bottom, you only get service if you press your face against the window screen. It is very aggravating to talk that way.
You are accessible to anyone’s calls at every moment, but you have to stop what you are doing also at any given moment someone might call. Texts, emails, get-togethers all give you time to transition into conversational modes. Phone calls do not. So I often just leave my phone under a pillow accidentally.
Also there is an illusion of multi-taskability with phone conversations. Like you can keep doing what you were doing while you talk. But if someone is driving, or half-surfing the internet while they are on the phone with you there are these awkward pauses and you can tell their attention is only half-there.
Also phone providing companies!! AHHHHh!
I like being able to hear the inflection in the other person’s voice and laugh together (“lol” does not compare to belly-laughing with someone on the other end of the phone and chiming in to make the story even better). I also like being able to take less time to tell my story than typing out oodles of words to get all the details in. However, I must say there are times when I don’t want the whole world (or rather, the people around me) to know what I’m talking about or I can’t call someone because I don’t have enough time for a whole conversation. Then, it is really convenient to be able to text and send a little message on it’s way.
I prefer to use the phone when I have a story to tell someone, when I’m catching up with someone, or if I’m really trying to connect with someone and can’t meet face to face. It is more personal than texting because it requires your full attention. You can always tell when you don’t have someone’s full attention while being on the phone.
I prefer to text if I just have a quick question to ask someone or if I want to get together with someone and set up a time to do that. Texting is nice for those things because you don’t have to make small talk and you can continue doing whatever you’re doing while you wait for them to reply. There are definitely benefits to both in my opinion.
I think that plainly put, there are levels to communication. If you’re choosing between a face-to-face conversation and a phone conversation, the choice option would be face-to-face. Though if you’re choosing between a phone conversation and a text conversation, the choice option would be phone. Consequently, there is also Facebook and email and word of mouth and letters…
The easy answer is that the means of communication depends on what you’re trying to communicate…but I think instead it depends on who you’re trying to communicate with–and by further extension who YOU are and how YOU communicate.
There is something to be said about hearing a person’s voice & vocal inflections. But there is something even greater to be said about seeing someone’s facial expressions. And maybe there’s even something to be said about a skilled text message–one that evokes emotion & sarcasm at just the right moments…so the question is: is that skilled texter a sign of our generation’s communication going down the toilet, or is that skilled texter simply a skilled writer who understands the power of grammar & syntax?